"A friend called me up the other day and talked about investing in a dot-com that sells lobsters. Internet lobsters. Where will this end? The next day he sent me a huge package of lobsters on ice. How low can you stoop?"Donald Trump
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Compromising With The IRS
Few things threaten your well-being like the harassment and anxiety of persistent tax problems. Most people make 3 mistakes that get them in trouble with the IRS. They procrastinate. They attempt to represent themselves. They hire sub-par representation ...
Payday Loans To Help The Budget
Majority of the people in the world have debts. Some of them have large debts. Even business tycoons have debts, the amounts of which are staggering to the average person. Yet, these business tycoons are not criticized when they apply for more loans. This ...
Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? ©
In order to achieve what you've never achieved before, you must be willing to do what you've never done before.While this concept may not be a secret to you, the overwhelming percentage of people who actually apply this principle is staggeringly low. In ...
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Multi-level marketing is a great way to make money for those who don't want to make any money. So for those of you smart enough to get in on a ground floor opportunity that's been around since the serpent conned Eve into signing on the dotted line, here are some pointers.
First, be your own best customer. This will make your up line extremely proud (and a bit richer). Dumping all your cleaning supplies, laundry detergent and cosmetics in the trash and replacing them with overpriced concentrate is a sure sign of financial genius What's more, it's important to believe in your product.
Second, make a list of everyone you want to annoy. This includes friends, family, coworkers and everyone in the white pages from the three closest cities. You'll earn a tiny commission off each one you enroll and that, my friend, is worth risking a lifetime of friendships. (Who knows? One of 'em may be the next big fish for the company. And you'll be the one who caught 'im!)
Third, systematically annoy everyone on your list. Invite them out to dinner. They won't mind being deceived into dining with a room full of brainwashed goofballs while some slickster shoots his power point presentation on a screen in the front of the room. The numbers don't lie. If you enroll eight people this week and they enroll eight people next week who enroll eight people the following week, in eleven short weeks all 6.4 billion inhabitants of the earth will be in your down line including an extra 2 billion from some unknown galaxy.
Fourth, act giddy. Phony enthusiasm is a proven sales gimmick, especially when coupled with idiotic product testimonials. Say something stupid like, “I cut my arm off a year ago and took some of these here vitamins. And whaddaya know?! My arm grew back. Hairs and all.” Everyone in the room will cheer.
Fifth, emphasize the success potential by pointing out the vast number of gullible people who are dumb enough to think they are all destined to be pyramid millionaires. This strategy really works. After all, it worked on you!
Sixth, appeal to greed and rank laziness. “Be your own boss,” is a nice phrase. Ask your friends if they would like to quit their jobs and work part time for a six-figure income. (Don't tell them that four of the six digits are to the right of the decimal.)
Seventh, use powerful terminology to impress your prospects. Never use words like “multi-level marketing” because someone may get the idea that your multi-level marketing scheme is a multi-level marketing scheme. “Direct to the consumer” sounds a lot better.
Eighth, project the image of success by buying the most expensive car on the market. Getting in debt up to your glassy eyeballs is a tried-and-proven financial strategy. It will pay off. Someday. Remember, if you want to be rich, you gotta start acting the part. Think of the wealthiest people you know (except maybe Howard Hughes) and start living like them. There's nothing like gross irresponsibility to get you on the right track.
Ninth, tell your prospects about the unseen benefits of owning their own business. Just think of all the stuff they can deduct from their income taxes, like one eighth of their bedroom if they use the corner for a home-office. Yes sir, you can pave your road to riches by wasting long hours for a tiny tax deduction.
Tenth, stay motivated by wasting; excuse me, “investing” an obscene amount of money in motivational tapes and CDs. Someday, when you hit the big time, you too can screw your down line out off thousands of dollars.
Next week. How to retire early buying lottery tickets.
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Backers of Mo. tax plan committed to Nov. voteCBS NewsA group wanting to replace Missouri's income tax with a higher and broader sales tax said Thursday that it is committed to getting the initiative on the November ballot, but declined to say how many millions of dollars it is willing to spend to try to ...and more » |
Bloomberg |
Hunting for Yield in Tax Liens May be RiskyBloombergEnlarge image Tax Liens Tax Liens Emile Wamsteker/Bloomberg Carl Smith, tax collector for the town of Orange, second from right, prepares to record payments from winning tax-lien auction bidders, lined up at left, at the municipal building in Orange, ...and more » |
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